Bibliography

The pictures I have used in my blog are not mine.  Since I've been so stressed with Pechorin breaking my heart,  drawing my own emotions would have caused me even more pain. I used pictures that described different events, interactions and occurrences in my life from the following sources:

http://www.parents-space.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/once-upon-a-time.jpg

http://www.eldritchpress.org/myl/pm2.jpg

http://static5.depositphotos.com/1002290/400/i/950/depositphotos_4007504-Illustration-of-a-couple-dancing-drawn-with-old-comic-style.jpg

http://www.womansavers.com/images/break_up_advice.jpg

http://thumbs.dreamstime.com/z/sick-girl-lying-bed-illustration-32237228.jpg

http://www.elfwood.com/art/s/k/skal/crying_princess_colored2.jpg

http://aloftyexistence.files.wordpress.com/2011/04/manipulation.jpg

http://www.zastavki.com/pictures/originals/2013/Love__037793_.jpg

I hope you learnt about my life and personality along with the behaviours and characteristics of other people that have been a part of my life. Thank you! 

The end of our story

I’ve been so depressed these few days.  I don’t know what to do anymore. Putting so much trust into someone and it getting crushed. My eyes are filled with sorrow. The monster came to visit me today.  He was rambling on, he treated my feelings like a joke.  Did he think this was some kind of comedy? Did he really have no care for others feelings? Did he think everything revolved around him and he was superior to everyone else? I hate him and told him that today.  All he did was thanked me and bowed.  Is that what he wanted to hear all along? His inability to love, his manipulative, opportunistic and vindictive characteristics still strike me as a surprise.  Years from now, I will look back at this time as the most exciting yet most depressing phase of my life.  Despite everything that happened between us, Pechorin was definitely unlike any other person I’ve ever known.

I, Princess Mary, have been fooled by love

My heart still yearns for you

My heart felt like it was in a million pieces

It’s been a few days since that horrific conversion.  I told him I loved him and he still showed no emotion.  What am I supposed to think? He just wants to make fun of my feelings.  I guess I was right the last time I wrote.  Yet, I still had a hope to forgive him of everything.  If he just told me the truth, his thinking, his feelings, I would have forgotten about everything and embraced him.  After begging him and telling him I love him, he replied by saying he does not love me.  I didn’t know how to react.  I wanted to be alone.  Tears streamed out of my face.  He really led me to believe that he was interested in me.  He does not know how to treat a woman.  

Only Your Thoughts

Earlier today I was sitting at the window thinking about Pechorin.  There was something different about him now.  I’m not sure what to think about his feelings towards me.  At first he acted like he didn't like me, then he treated me so nicely and now he’s ignoring me again.  Is this a game to him? Does he think I'm a pawn in a game of his?  Deep in thought I was when suddenly Pechorin entered the room. It must have been fate’s doing.  Talking about my emotions to him was of no use at all.  If I remember correctly, his exact words were, “There’s no reason for you to know what’s been going on in my heart. You’ll never know, and so much the better for you.” He said good-bye and then left! Can you believe it? I am sitting here crying. I can’t believe I was so stupid to think he liked me.  I trust and fall in love with people to easily. He made me believe it. I feel so hurt and used. Why would he do this to me? There must be a reason. I need to talk to him again.

Have my emotions been played with? 

Where are you?

As I lay in bed with the flu after the ball last night, I cannot help but think about Pechorin. Maybe if I see his face everything will get better.  Those mysterious eyes, that strong build, his intriguing comments, his alluring attitude.  Something about him I really need to see.

Add caption

You are the one

Tonight was the ball. The night began with Grushnitsky coming to talk to me. Oh how I wished it was Pechorin! I glanced around the hall in search of Pechorin.  There I saw him him standing with a group of men.  Grushnitsky was telling me that I’ve changed a lot. At this point, I really didn't care what he thought about me.  Pechorin was the one my heart belonged to.  In my opinion Grushnitsky had no experience with women.  He called me "My Mary." I find that rather odd.  However, his naive personality was kind of cute. After a few more quick phrases my eyes lit up.  Pechorin came and bowed to me.  I couldn’t help but feel the need to smile while my cheeks turned rosy red.  Grushnitsky danced with me the whole night! I am fed up with him! Pechorin is the one I wanted to dance with! One more look at Grushnitsky and I’m ready to punch him in the face. However, at the end of the night, my heart was complete.  Pechorin kissed my hand as I was making my way to the carriage. The darkness of the night made this moment even more special.  As I write this before bed, I am sure my dreams will be filled with Pechorin.  I cannot take my mind off of him. 

I wished we could sit in each other's presence forever